Friday, 27 November 2015

Music to Parent to

So last Saturday I found myself with four whole hours of solitary peace and quiet to fill, while I winged my way down to London on the train.

But, how to keep myself occupied?  Read?  Tweet?  Possibly.  But what I really relish these days is being able to listen to music on my headphones without being interrupted every five minutes by a child.  It's quite a rare thing for me.

I'm getting back into the habit of listening to music just lately.  Especially to break up the monotony of the day, like when I'm running, or ironing or whatever. (Probably just running or ironing to be honest - such is the complete lack of excitement in my life right now), but even that isn't the same as just being able to listen without one eye on the clock or the road or a child.

The teens do the eye-roll thing every time we watch the X Factor and I exclaim "ooh, I could buy that and listen to it when I run/iron".

"No Mum, just stream it on Spotify or YouTube, don't pay for it."

*mind blown*

They will never know the pain and frustration of having to save up the money earned on a paper round for an entire month, and then hot foot it (or hot bus it) into town to the local Our Price to buy an album.  They just don't understand how easy they've got it nowadays.

But what's more, is not only have I started to do just that (the streaming thing, which is like some kind of modern day magic if you ask me), but, via the medium of Apple Music, my phone has even started suggesting music for me to listen to (the staff in Our Price never did that).

The other day it was this:

Oh Apple Music, do you really know me at all?

To which my husband helpfully commented, "don't they have a 'Music to burn things to' playlist?"

Git.

But come to think of it, while there are playlists available for all kinds of activities, there are still a few missing.  And why is there nothing specifically for us parents, to break up the tedium of looking after the small people all day?  It's an untapped market, I tell you.

So as I was scrolling through trying to choose something suitable for the train journey, I made one.

Music to Parent to - a playlist for people with children.

Sam Smith, Writing's on the Wall - and the sofa, the carpet, the dining room table legs (why does biro never come off?)

Little Mix, Black Magic - Mmmm, chocolate... (not sharing it)

KDA, Turn the Music Louder - until I can't hear the sound of whinging children any more

Oasis, Half the World Away - yup, that's bedtime! (only another six hours *sigh*)

Rachel Platten, Fight Song - room sharing for siblings

James Bay, Hold Back the River - we're potty training (again)

One Direction, Drag Me Down - Drag me down the big slide at soft play, drag me down the sweetie aisle in Tesco, drag me down the stairs at 6.30 am on a weekend...

Jess Glynne, Hold My Hand - while we cross the road.  No you can't walk by yourself, you are still too little to cross on your own.

Taylor Swift, Shake It Off - your shoe, honestly I told you to watch where you were walking!

Justin Bieber, What Do You Mean? - You know I can't understand a word you are saying while you are having a tantrum...

What's the betting that even if such things did exist, nobody would be able to listen to them without being interrupted by "Mum, mum, mum, mum!" or "can you get me a drink?" and the universally acclaimed "What's for dinnerrrr?"

Maybe it's a market best left untapped after all.

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