Thursday, 15 May 2014

The Emperor's New Clothes

I'm all for new stuff, for trying something different, but lately I'm just a bit annoyed with some of the new things I see and read about.  Actually, I'm not just a bit annoyed, I'm grumpy.

There was a time that I'd have embraced new ideas with open arms.  These days I can't help but wonder if everything I see is just a reinvention of something else and well, it bores me.  It's probably my age.

This is not a Room 101 post, because if it was it would be about all the things that I hate, the things that I'd get rid of if I could.  No, these are the things that I just don't understand.  You know, the sort of things that people say "ohh, you must try such and such, it's sooo amazing!", when really it isn't.  So, here then, is a list of all the things that have recently made me think, WTF?

Pulled Pork

It's pork.  You pull it apart and suddenly it becomes the must cook recipe.  I'm sorry but I just don't get it.  Did people used to be so excited by bacon, roast pork or ham I wonder? I like pork, and as a family I'd say we eat more than our fair share of it, despite this I don't see why having it pulled makes it better.  If you pull meat apart it becomes stringy and gets stuck in your teeth.  Bleurgh.  Enough said.

Carpet Picnics

Where you have a picnic on the carpet, usually in the company of small children (probably because it's raining too), and that's basically it. In our house we call it having a sandwich in the living room.  Besides, children aren't that stupid, even the really little ones, "What did you do today kids?", "Mummy made us sit on the carpet and eat our sandwiches".  It doesn't sound very exciting does it?


Yay!  We're in a tent in the living room and eating - and they call this fun?

Staycations

So instead of going away on holiday, when you book time off work and stay at home you are supposed to call it a staycation.  A vacation at home.  I don't know about you, but when I stay at home it isn't anything like a vacation.  I still cook, clean, wash and iron, which doesn't sound very much like a holiday to me.  It should just be called, "Mum does everything as usual while everyone sits around on their arse".  The end.

Chimineas

Like a barbecue without the food.  So, essentially just hot smoke filled air emanating from your patio.  Why on earth would you want this?  If you want to sit outside late at night and stay warm then just wrap up a bit.  Why start a small fire inside a malformed plant pot? - they look silly and annoy me smoke out the neighbours.  You are not a Mexican Tribesman (wiki it!).  Just stop it.

Date Night

Is there anyone in the world that doesn't feel just a little bit silly when using this phrase?  A date is something that you go on with someone new, to get to know one another.  It is not something that happens with your husband, partner or significant other because you already know one another.  So, if you are going out together, sans children then that's all it is, it is not a date.

None of these things are as exciting as they sound, am I right or am I wrong?  Which new-fangled things are your "Emperor's New Clothes"?

4 comments:

  1. Ohh I love Barbecue Pulled Pork....I've been eating it for years so it's not new to me....
    The 'Date Night' phrase really annoys me...lol

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    1. I'm sure it's great really, I just don't want 87 celebrity chefs sharing their recipes for it with me like they invented it or something.

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  2. Here's my input: in the US, pulled pork *mostly* refers to the BBQ kind. It's absolutely delicious because you cook the pork, then pull it, then drench it in sauce and let it continue to cook in the slow cooker. The meat absorbs the sauce and is so moist and just melts in your mouth - it's amazing!

    Carpet picnics, staycations, and chimineas (just have a bonfire - they are so much fun!) - I agree with you.

    Date night - I totally have to disagree on this one. I think it's important to continue to "date" even after you are in a committed relationship. Maybe I'm just needy but I love having my man continue to "woo" me from time to time. ;)

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    1. It really is the latest must cook recipe here at the moment. If it really is nice then that's fine but people seem to act like they've just invented it. Most annoying!

      I think date night is probably more common a phrase in the US anyway. I have no problem with people going out with their partners (I do it sometimes too!). It's just really odd how they seem to be using this phrase to describe it all of a sudden.

      Glad you agree on the others - blooming silly they are!

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